16 Halloween Costumes All Marylanders Will Understand
CAPITAL NEWS SERVICE
COLLEGE PARK - It's a week until Halloween and you haven't done any planning. We've got you covered with these easy-to-pull-together Maryland-themed costumes.
1) A Crab
These felt hats are available for less than $10 on Amazon. Throw on some red clothes (or blue) and sprinkle Old Bay all over your body for an authentic aroma.
2) Couples Costume: Natty Boh Guy and Utz Girl
These Baltimore staples are a great option for lovebirds. Achieve Natty Boh guy by face painting one eye black and white or have a friend punch you in the eye a few days before Halloween. Utz Girl has a distinctive bob haircut, a red bow and red cheeks.
3) A Raven
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This 17th century plague doctor looks a little bit like a raven and is just as creepy. Wear all black, this mask and a cape.
4) Barb Mikulski
Babs is known for two things: being the longest-serving woman in Congress and pantsuits. You can get an orange one like hers here.
5) Martin O'Malley
Image source: Flickr user MDGovpics
Remove your shirt and ask for debates at every house on your trick-or-treating route. For a better resemblance, wear these.
6) Washington NFL Franchise
Capture the controversy surrounding the name of D.C.'s football team by wearing official team gear and blacking out the name and logo.
7) The Chesapeake Bay
Wear shades of blue, green and brown. Make sure to get mud on your shoes, and put bay grasses in your hair. For a fun party trick, bring an American eel (native to the Bay) with you and throw it into the mix, just to see what happens.
8) Ocean City Boardwalk
Get a section of your hair wrapped, apply a henna tattoo and wear the most offensive t-shirt you own. Carry around a putter so you're prepared for any and all minigolf courses you come across.
9) National Aquarium
The Baltimore landmark has almost 20,000 animals. Try to incorporate as many of these animals as possible into this costume. Recycle the crab hat from the first costume on this list, put a shark fin on your back, wear horseshoe crabs on your feet, put starfish over your eyes and drape the eel from number seven around your neck.
10) I-95 Gridlock
Purchase two to three Hot Wheels gift packs and attach the cars to your body in straight, bumper-to-bumper rows. When you get in line for food, drinks or the bathroom at Halloween parties, continuously switch lines to find the quickest moving one.
11) An O
Dress in this orange morphsuit and roll your body into an O shape in honor of Baltimore's baseball team. Stay that way all night.
12) Annapolis' Ego Alley
Line the left and right sides of your body with elaborate model yachts in honor of the area in downtown Annapolis where boaters dock their expensive watercraft. Refuse to speak to anyone unless they first confirm their ownership of a boat. Once they do, assure them your boat is better.
13) Smith Island Cake
Wear light yellow and slather yourself with creamy fudge in a striped pattern to create the illusion that you are layered.
14) Chevy Chase, Maryland
Dress like the actor Chevy Chase in "National Lampoon's Vacation." This means some muted slacks, a short sleeve polo and a tan windbreaker. Tuck your polo into your jeans. Your parents friends will get it, we promise.
15) Aftermath of the Preakness
The infield of Pimlico Race Course after the day's festivities is disgusting. Emulate it by wearing a beer case as a hat. Attach various cans and trash to your clothing. Follow this oddly specific tutorial to make fake vomit, and pour that on yourself, too. Ask everyone you meet if Seabiscuit won.
16) Group Costume: A Fight at Merriweather Post Pavilion
This can be done with anywhere from two to 13 people. Dress everyone in their best cutoff shirts and boots. Walk around with your posse, picking arguments every 100 yards or so. Also, cover yourself with beer and walk through a cloud of vape pen smoke that faintly reeks of vanilla spice.